Sometimes life takes you places that you don't want to go, and away from the company that you'd rather keep. Looking back on my travels I can see the truth in that, and to some extent it grieves my heart to know that the friends I've had and left behind I might never have again until Eternity. Even this last move, that was only 15 miles down the road from where I was, I now start to miss things about the place I've just left. The fellowship and common purpose that is, not the mess. But I guess that's the thing about life is that, at times, it seems kind of aimless and meandering. In these times it's easy to feel the dissonance of experience and faith. The lack of resolution that comes from the perpetually unanswered question of why. But I wonder what it is that is in us that expects anything better than cosmic silence. What it is that demands that we have stability now, in a world that's turbulent because of our lack of righteousness. That's one of the greatest things about Christianity, the fact that God isn't afraid to let us feel the weight of time, and the burden of experiencing life outside of eternity. He isn't afraid to let us deal with what we've done, and at the same time he promises eternity to those of us who are willing to fight our unbelief for his sake, and sojourn through this life on his terms, even when his terms seem to do us more harm than good. I see through a dirty glass, and even the unclear image of Heaven is overwhelming to me, and the desire for it is, maybe, more intense because I know that were it not for God's purposes I would not be here. But I can always look forward to the moment when my life here will seem like a shadow passing, and I feel the freedom that my heart cries out for.
